Temperatures are rising because of greenhouse gases; energy industry says renewable energy will cost more; Greens call energy industry self-serving. NZ cricketer says Aussie cricketers are arrogant; Aussie cricketer arrogantly dismisses criticism. Govt sticks to clichéd excuses and bland reassurances about David Hicks; Dems say govt will lose votes over it (in Balmain and Fitzroy). NSW Labor is dodgy as all hell. Invading Iraq was a bad idea. Celebrities are stupid, superficial and self absorbed. Men like ladies in skimpy clothes but mothers don’t like naked young men. Criminals have greater job satisfaction than police, but if you poison your husband with arsenic, you will probably get caught.
Archive for January, 2007
Tony Abbott’s 10 commandments
31 Jan 2007An odd column today from Health Minister Tony Abbott, in which I think he’s saying Catholics used to be involved in the Labor Party way back when, but now the Libs better represent Catholic values while Labor voters are a bunch of godless atheist heathen secular humanist progressive types.
Abbott dismisses Kevin Rudd’s own religious convictions, and his me-too assertion that Labor politicos can be just as nutso religious as their Coalition counterparts, as “politically correct Christianity”. He adds that “Voters seem to have concluded any affinity between Labor policies and Christian values is more by accident than design”.
Spruiking his side of politics’s credentials as Jesus freaks, Abbott says:
The Howard Government has overturned euthanasia laws, banned gay marriage, stopped the ACT heroin trial, encouraged independent schools, contracted Job Network services to church organisations, established pregnancy support counselling and improved the absolute and relative financial standing of families with children.
The worst part is, I think he’s saying these are good things.
AIDS ads? FABULOUS!
31 Jan 2007You’d think with a subject as serious as the rise of the HIV infection rate, even the Herald could manage a slightly respectful and serious tone. And you’d be wrong.
Ruth Pollard’s article Surge in HIV figures a grim reality starts out gloomy and serious enough, but this only lasts until around the point where she tells us:
Australia has an internationally respected record in HIV, containing the epidemic mostly amongst gay men and limiting its spread in the broader community.
So it’s only gay people dying. That makes it OK. Respected, even.
Evolution in action
31 Jan 2007Wow - misogyny, bad grammar and console games, together at last.
I suppose we should be grateful to gamers for removing themselves from the gene pool.
Ugly blokes, more like
18 Jan 2007
The Herald’s beauty bloggumist Lisa Bjorksten tells us how odd it made her feel that America Ferrera (that’s her on the right) won the best comedy actress Golden Globe award for her role in Ugly Betty. I mean, for starters her character is called “Ugly Betty”, which is a signal to United States viewers that she is, in fact, ugly; being from the US, US viewers might otherwise not be able to work this out for themselves. Also, like, omigod, she’s not anorexic or toned or facelifted or waxed or botoxed or anything. Like, huh?
The thing is, America Ferrera is only 22 years old, so she probably doesn’t need botox or a facelift just yet. She’s also not at all ugly (see photo to the left). But as in all fashion reporting, you don’t need more than one instance of anything to write an article speculating about a new trend. “Is it the start of things to come?” Bjorksten ponders. “Will actresses like America Ferrara [sic] help stop our obession [sic] with way-too-skinny, Botoxed stars?”
Uh . . . no?
Office memo: mufti day
15 Jan 2007In response to a number of questions and complaints about mufti day on Friday, management wanted to set out some guidelines to make sure everyone behaves in line with our shared values.
- On mufti day, everyone should feel free to make comments offensive to women, Jews, Christians, white people, men, gays and lesbians, non-Muslims, moderate Muslims and some non-moderate Muslims.
- These comments should subsequently be explained as having been taken out of context or badly translated from the original language.
- When outside the company, people should make every effort to denigrate the company in the harshest possible terms.
- When inside the company or speaking to company representatives, people should explain how this is the greatest company in the world.
- Men and women should dress modestly to prevent lustful thoughts that could have a negative impact on corporate productivity.
- If women dress immodestly, they shouldn’t complain if some hungry animals eat their uncovered meat.
- If male employees are disciplined for eating the uncovered meat, the harshness of their punishment should be attributed to anti-Muslim discrimination.
- Any difficulties interpreting these guidelines are a result of them being badly translated and taken out of context.
