Archive for May, 2007

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Testing the limits of understatement

30 May 2007

Tonight at the Sydney Writers’ Festival launch I was inspired beyond words (and you know that’s not like me) by Andrew O’Hagan’s speech, particularly the idea that so many of the world’s problems - wars, famines, corruption, and the rest - are caused by a failure of imagination.

I believe it is a failure of the imagination that allows famine or terror to reign in the world. A man who throws half the contents of his fridge into the trash on a Monday morning fails to imagine, next time he visits the supermarket, that whole villages in Eritrea have children gasping for a droplet of milk. The politician or the general who orders a solider to release cruise missiles from 5000 feet does not imagine the innocent men playing cards in the teashop below. He does not imagine their loss or the grief of their loved ones. The terrorist at the controls of a plane cannot imagine the dreams of the secretary on the 102nd floor, planning her wedding and making a bid for life. Failures of the imagination are behind the conduct of our woes – and so we as we gather here to salute literature and the imagination we also come to denounce those failures of the imagination that harm and betray and destroy life.

A simple, but very powerful idea. Which, like all conspiracy theories and pat generalisations about state of the world, probably has gaping flaws somewhere. I’m just not sure what they are yet.

At the party afterwards, I was introduced to Sophie Gee, a rather gorgeous woman about my age who is an assistant professor at Princeton and just published her first novel. (She was also mentioned in a Paul Sheehan column, but I won’t hold that against her.) Upon being introduced, I shuffled a bit and mumbled a few uninteresting things.

I am a tad annoyed at myself about that.

Posted in sensitive stuff about chicks, wordy things | 2 Comments »

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Finally, SATC helps me get laid

10 May 2007

Sydney Morning Herald and Sun Herald staff went on strike yesterday afternoon over planned redundancies of 35 staff. If one had hoped we would at least be spared another Miranda Devine outrage, it turns out one would have been disappointed. Though perhaps in support of her striking colleagues, it could at least be said that Miranda put no effort whatsoever into research or good writing.

Meanwhile, fellow strike-breaking scab Sam and the City has found yet another marketroid category of man whom women should want to date: the technosexual.

Hence there was a gap in the market for a man that not only good looked good, but could fix the DVD player, sync the iPod to their laptop and configure their internet connection so they could do the shopping, pay the bills and get the latest installment of Perez Hilton.

One of Sam’s readers mentioned the F-word - feminism - and asked why women should not be able to fix their own laptops and internet connections. To which Sam probably responded, “Don’t ask me, I’m just a girl! *giggle*”

Because Sam believes in thorough research almost as much as Miranda, she actually goes as far as the other end of the hallway for her archetypal dateable nerd: SMH tech reporter Asher Moses. Yes, the same SMH tech section that features all those stories about Google and Second Life and Wikipedia, not that they’re chasing page impressions to boost ad revenue, or anything.

Actually, I reckon Sam and Asher would make a great couple. They’re both yids and clearly have similar attitudes to research and the whole journalistic-standards-vs-populism debate. And not only is Asher fairly easy on the eyes, so Sam seems to think, he also falls into a terribly fashionable stereotype that would demonstrate Sam’s ability to stay at the bleeding edge of social trends.

Meanwhile, I will be hanging out in dry-cleaner bars (the sort of places women go to pick up a suit), flashing my BlackBerry and talking loudly about fixing DVD players and synchronising iPods.

Please form an orderly queue, ladies.

Posted in marketroids, media, sensitive stuff about chicks, techno-wankery | 5 Comments »

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Behold the fiscal prophet hath spoken

7 May 2007

With the powers of prophecy the Lord has granted me, I can predict a full 24 hours before the treasurer publishes the federal budget that it will contain:

  • Handouts for breeders in McMansions
  • Handouts for old geezers
  • Pork barrelling for marginal seats
  • More money allocated to advertising than alternative energy research
  • Meretricious and ineffectual spending on health, education, climate change, infrastructure or anything else useful
  • Piddling tax cuts that are an outrage given the enormity of the surplus of our money the government has taken from us and then refused to tell us why we shouldn’t get it back, which are at the same time criminally negligent tax cuts, given we know Australians will spend the extra money on plasma TVs and poker machines instead of saving it, thus driving up inflation and interest rates
  • Absolutely fuck all for me.

The Lord has blessed me with the uncanny ability to determine that when you see something happening again and again and again, you call it a pattern.

Posted in money, politics | 3 Comments »

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Newsflash: journalist has principles

4 May 2007

PC World magazine Editor-in-Chief Harry McCracken resigned this week, claiming new CEO Colin Crawford tried to kill a story that was critical of Apple and Steve Jobs. Crawford reportedly also told editors they needed to be nicer to advertisers and write less critical reviews.

It’s hardly shocking that a publisher tried to heavy editors into playing nice with advertisers - that happens all the time.

Advertisers want favourable editorial, sure, but they also want to advertise in publications with loyal readers in valuable target markets. Readers only stay loyal if they believe the editors make independent and critical judgments free of commercial motives. Otherwise they could just read the corporate gumf. But publishers are remarkably thick-headed when it comes understanding this idea.

The real news is that a journalist quit over this principle rather than doing what he was told.

Not that it’ll make any difference. McCracken will no doubt be replaced by someone who has fewer principles, or different ones.

Posted in marketroids, media | 2 Comments »

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Religious ≠ trustworthy

2 May 2007

Brit backpackers Caroline Day and Mei-Yin Lee’s elation when they found out they won $574,000 soon turned to shock and dismay when it turned out the friendly chap at the newsagency, Chrishartato Ongkoputra or Chris Ong, had done the old switcheroo and submitted a claim form with their ticket and his name on it. NSW Lotteries paid him the money and he mysteriously left the country.

Day and Lee had to sue NSW Lotteries to get the money, which they did, and now the lottery and the newsagent (and the newsagent’s insurance company) are in court to see who’s liable. The newsagent Michael Pavellis admitted he didn’t check the form before sending it off, explaining:

He was a religious person; he went to church twice a week. I know it sounds strange after what has happened, but he was an active member of the church band. He was a well-liked person.

Classic blunder, assuming a religious person is trustworthy. There are plenty of people who display all the outward trappings of religiosity while being complete scoundrels or deviants.

We assume otherwise at our peril.

And let’s not forget modern, hip Christianity tells us God Wants You to be Rich and God Wants You to be Wealthy. (I never really understood that thing about rich men, camels and needles or why Jesus knocked over the moneylenders’ tables anyway.)

Surely Ong was just being a Good Christian.

Posted in filthy kike propaganda, money | No Comments »